Why is it that if ten wonderful things happen to you in a day and one very annoying thing also happens the same day, you are more likely to remember the one and not the ten? It’s because as a member of the human race you have a natural negativity bias.  

As Rick Hanson says, “the brain is like Velcro for negative experiences but Teflon for positive experiences,” meaning it quickly registers negative things but glosses over the positive. This may seem like faulty design, but actually makes sense if you consider the evolution of our species: It was much more important to our survival to avoid an approaching tiger than the marvel at a rainbow.  

Thankfully we have the power to rewire this negativity. Neuroscientists like to say, “as neurons fire together they wire together.” If we think negative thoughts our brain will only strengthen this negativity. We therefore need to make a mindful point to do a “positivity brain workout” to do the opposite. How do we do this?

1)   Pay attention to small joys 

We need first to pay attention to the small joys in life wherever we find them and not take them for granted. Everyone can find a small joy in life despite whatever else is happening. When you find yourself head-bopping to a song, take it in. When you see something beautiful, make a point of noticing the beauty. When a stranger smiles at you, appreciate the connection.

2)   The 30 second rule

It’s not enough however to just notice. In order to strengthen the synapses in the brain for positivity, you have to encode the positive thoughts, or they will be forgotten. Negative inputs and fantastic inputs will encode immediately, however ordinary positive inputs require longer to encode on the brain. Hanson suggests spending 10-30 seconds thinking about positive moments in order to fully encode the small joys.  

3)   Gratitude Cubed

Once the positive experience has had a chance to imprint, we can reinforce the positive brain connections by consolidating them with gratitude lists. It’s the opposite of negative rumination (which our negative brains are more apt to do). At some point daily, make a mental, written or recorded list of what you are grateful for. Don’t just list things off by rote. Really think of three things from that particular day that you were grateful for and take each in for a full 10-30 seconds and feel it in your body. In addition to consolidating the small joys of the day, this practice also orients you to pay attention to moments of joy each day.

How do you combat negativity? Share tips about what works for you. 

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