Last post I looked at the phenomenon of the exploding brain. Here is what to do if you recognize your brain is overloaded and emotionally hijacked.

1)   First notice and name: Make a point of paying attention to the signs of brain explosion (can’t find your words, yelling, heart racing, muscle tension, etc.) so you become aware it is happening. Then note to yourself “my brain is not working.” This action will create space between your observant brain and the emotion and will slow things down.

2)   Hit Pause: Don’t try to “figure things out” in that moment. Your brain is flooded and can’t access logical thought, so you’ll just end up more frustrated and overwhelmed. I often tell couples “don’t talk to an exploding brain”- if either brain is exploding, nothing will be resolved. If an argument is spiraling down, stop talking- you will only dig a deeper hole by continuing with a brain that isn’t functioning correctly. Wait until your brain has come back online before trying to be logical. 

3)   Calm your nervous system: Now that you’ve pressed the pause button, it’s time to attend to your nervous system so that your thinking brain can come back online. How do we do that? Here are two things to try that take just a few minutes: 

a.    Grounding: Being in our heads makes us more anxious so move the center of gravity down to your body. If seated, feel your feet on the floor and your body being supported by gravity. Notice all the points of contact with your body (eg. bottom on seat cushion, back on back cushion, hands on lap). Focus your attention for 15 seconds making contact with each and sense into where you feel it the most.

b.    Breathing Meditation: Without changing your breath, notice where you feel yourself inhale and exhale- nose, throat, chest, or belly. Follow the inhale and exhale by repeating to yourself “inhale/exhale.” Repeat for a few minutes. When you get distracted, return to the breath.

I’ve seen couples and individuals get themselves out of many pickles using these techniques. Let me know if you’ve tried these or other ways to calm your exploding brain- what works for you?  

In my next post, I’ll talk about how to turn around negativity in the overloaded brain.

Photo by Simon Migaj from Pexels