Here in Southern California, where earthquakes rattle our homes and the arrival of fall brings brown clouds and the smell of smoke, we live in a culture of disaster preparedness. We are accustomed to having at least a mental list, if not an actual backpack ready, of essentials to grab in case of need for sudden evacuation. When it comes to common emotional challenges, however, many of us find ourselves unprepared.
In a moment of crisis, panic, or depression, it’s hard to figure out how to cope because often the thinking brain shuts down. It’s a good idea, then, to have our emotional survival kit at the ready: a pre-planned list of ways to resource ourselves when the need arises.
How to Create an Emotional Survival Kit:
1. External Resources: Make a list of the people who most support you tangibly and emotionally. Likely it’s not one person for all things- some people are good cheerleaders, some are good problem-solvers, some will distract with laughter, some can pick up the kids, and some know when to just listen and give you a hug. List all the people who are helpful in these various ways- friends, family, colleagues, coaches, therapists, etc.
2. Internal Resources: Make a list of all the things that you know help calm your nervous system if you are anxious or bring joy if depressed. For example,
a. Make a playlist of music that makes you feel good when sad, powerful when you feel weak.
b. Write a list of simple pleasures that can shift your mood: walking in nature, calling a friend, reading a book, drawing/singing/dancing, lighting a candle, watching a movie, taking a bath, etc.
c. Take photos of images you find restorative or calming.
d. List quick physical actions that calm you: muscle relaxation, mindful meditation, grounding, breathing exercises, visualizations.
Compile these lists somewhere where it’s easily accessible so you can remember to draw on them when needed. I find that in emotional crisis, people often forget to use tools that they already have identified because their brains are not working appropriately. Keep a list on your phone or use an App that you can refer back to.
Remember next time you are having a moment- you’ve got this!
Photo credit: https://spencergurley.myportfolio.com/photography?ref=pexels